January 2017 (6 years and 4 months old)

Dear Patrick,

• This month snow came late on 2/6 Friday night and made a weekend of play. Greenville county closed school that following Monday and Tuesday. Your dad volunteered to take you with him to work and you decided on your own to “suit-up” too. You both looked so great.   
• You created a new animal called a “Cheetah-tang,” which is a obviously a cross between a cheetah and an orangutan.
• During wrestling time, you shout out moves before you perform them. Spikey bolder, super-poison snap dragon and ninja swipe are my favorite.
• Your goals for 2017 are to ride a roller-coaster, eat lasagna,
• On 1/13 it was a teacher workday and we volunteers to keep Rivers at our house. I took you boys to the playground outside the zoo in the morning and then your dad took you both to the Pavilion that afternoon.
• On Monday 1/16 you went to Rivers house to play and your father and I took the morning off from work to watch the ESPN documentary “OJ Made In America,” which was an awesome treat to ourselves.
• This month I’ve been working with the Principal and a small group of parents to bring the “Leader In Me” initiative to Summit Drive Elementary. I know you don’t understand it now, but I hope these effort will be productive in the next few years.
• We picked up Mason and his sister Kate from school for a playdate at our house on Thursday 1/26 and schedule another play date with Mordichi on Friday 1/27.
• On 1/31 it was the 100th day of school and you announced the evening before that you wanted to wear a shirt made of 100 things, so out came the glue gun. 
• On Tuesday 1/3 we left the house at 7:35am with plenty of time to walk to school. The weather wasn’t cold yet and it wasn’t raining. As we got in front of the Howell's house, you said he wanted to spit out your gum out and go home and grab another piece. "You can spit out your gum, but you can't go home - we need to get to school," I said. You whined and complained but we walked on. You were mad, and I probably should've let you be mad, but I wanted to make it better for us both right away. That was my mistake. I wanted to control the situation and so did you. That afternoon you met me with a hug and a big smile - all was forgotten. So I didn’t bring up the morning - even to tell you that I was sorry, so I’m saying it now. Moms can make mistakes too.

December 2016 (6 years and 3 months old)

Dear Patrick,

• Your Christmas list to Santa included ninja turtle and star wars Legos, shoes with wheels, a metal detector, beyblades, confetti, and a suit and tie, which made me laugh - Patrick P Keaton. Of course, anytime someone asks what you want from Santa, your list grows longer.
• I’m biased, but I think your cookies were the best at the annual Whitaker Cookie Party this year. You didn’t even eat them - you saved them to bring to Biggie and Gangie when you spent the night later that evening.
• We got our Christmas tree in the rain on Sunday 12/4. It was the quickest selection in history because we basically chose one by pointing from the car window and throwing cash.
• For a boy who prides himself on on greens and blues (and even a few pink superstars), you have tipped the behavior color chart scale in the other direction with two yellows and a red - in a row - this month. Your teacher explained how the excitement of the season is tough on most kids. We took your screen time and dessert away to make a point, but a part of me is really happy you have such good friends in your life. Of course I want you to learn self discipline - I just also love that you practice sign language across the classroom mat with your best friend Mason.
• On Saturday 12/10 after ice skating downtown with the Meredith family for Kate's birthday, you suggested that we come home and “get cozy,” which basically means you getting back into your PJs and requesting hot chocolate as we finish the movie Annie we had started that morning. What a Hard Knock Life.
• As I put you to bed Sunday 12/11, I asked if you remembered how angry you had become when trying to learn how to ice skate the day before. I chose my words carefully because although I didn’t want to bring up a negative experience, I felt it was important to discuss. “I want you to know that this won’t be the last time you will feel angry, sad or frustrated,” I said. “Life is full of new stuff and those new challenges are hard. But it’s good that things are hard because those are the times that push us to be better.” I asked you to try and remember the next time, when you think you can’t, to take a deep breath and try again. I said, “I’m most proud of you not when you win, but when you work really hard. The effort is the key.” I’m not sure that my ramblings in the dark at bedtime really sunk in for you, but I gave it my best effort.
• Watching you laugh at the movie, “Home Alone” on Saturday 12/18 made my entire holiday. I was nervous at first that the movie might be too old for you - or scary since robbers were breaking into a home, but you were laughing so hard that you had tears in your eyes. You laugh with your whole body. A great, big, huge belly laugh that comes pouring out of you and reddens your face. I will never forget it. I want to watch this movie with you every day.
• On 12/19 when I dropped you off for winter camp at The Children’s Museum, you walked right up to the front table, eager to meet new friends. The staff introduced you to another boy named Patrick and I heard you say, "You can call me Patrick B - everyone at my school does."
• Uncle Jono, Aunt Jen and cousin Jack came into town at the end of the month and my favorite time was having them over our house and then later meeting Big Mitchell and Gangie out for drinks and snacks.
• Omi and Pop were in town for Christmas and we ate the best Yorkshire pudding to date - cooking-in-law gave a strong performance. I also loved watching Omi help you read your letter from Santa. The day after Christmas, Pop dropped Omi off at the Atlanta airport on his way back to Macon so that Omi could go visit Uncle Bunky in Paris.
• When we drove the Shreveport this year to visit the Richards, we expected a great time with great friends. I did not expect breakfast in bed, mother-daughter violin serenades, late night PJs and spiked apple cider, beautiful weather and making homemade ornaments in the sunshine.
• After 12 hours in a car (on the drive home), it’s understandable to be a little frustrated behind the wheel. At one point, your father muttered under his breath and you, not understanding, asked from the backseat, “What’s a gass-old?”
• We celebrated the end of 2016 in Pell City, Alabama. The rain was relentless and although we wanted to keep driving, we made the decision to stop. As you slept soundly in our Hampton Inn hotel room, your father and I toasted with bourbon in paper cups. Happy New Year!

November 2016: 74 months (6 years and 2 months old)

Dear Patrick,

• You told your teacher, Mrs Robertson, that I was expecting twins and that we had a party where we opened a box and pink and blue balloons floated out revealing a boy and girl to join our family. You were so convincing that she sent me a formal congratulations email. Seriously.
• You tell me there are two second grade girls who call you “cutie-pie” and want to marry you at school. “No, Mom, you don’t understand - they want to kiss me,” you said somehow with both shock and a huge smile on your face.
• On Saturday 11/12, we went to the Wiles house to watch the football games with friends. A boy named Holden, who lives next door to Rivers, came with the Whitehead family and I watched from the window as he and Virginia sat on one side of the stairs and you off to the other side. You were crying. I knew I shouldn’t get involved; the rational side of me knew this was just a part of growing up, but watching your child hurt is hard. I made an excuse to walk by the group of kids and as I approached, I asked everyone what was going on. Holden mumbled something about you being a baby. I turned to face Holden (with black eyes and a finger pointed in his direction) and said, “I don’t think that is being a very good friend.” I walked on. I didn’t stop to comfort you or even look at you because I knew that I needed to let you figure it out on your own. Life hurts your feelings - we have to find a way to deal. You dealt by invoking forgiveness and eventually playing again with the group. I dealt with giving another stink-eye to Holden.
• On Sunday 11/13 you went to the hockey game with your Dad and got on the jumbo-tron. Your dad said that he has never seen you so excited! You worked hard, dancing every time the camera was near you until eventually, you were rewarded. Once “live” you apparently turned to your dad and gave him a top five hug of his life.
• You stood in line with us for an hour and fifteen minutes in the cold outside your school to watch us vote for the next President of the United States. Sadly, Hillary didn’t win, but I was grateful to have you at my side voting for the first female candidate for office.
• School had a book fair on Monday 11/14 and when I picked you up from late stay, you asked if I would buy you a Pokemon guide book that you had seen and picked out earlier in the day. I would have preferred something a bit more educational, but seeing how happy you were for this one book was awesome. You spent that whole evening and next morning “reading,” carefully turning each page and studying the pictures.
• You call your winter coat “Big Puff.”
• I met your friend Mason (and his mom Jenny) at the Thanksgiving Day program at school as we stood in line together. You two boys were really funny together and it made me happy to know you have such a nice friend in class.
• We went to Macon for Thanksgiving this year and upon arrival you asked Omi if she had a new toy for you. With your hand cupped to the side of your mouth you said to me in total confidence, “There is always a surprise for me.” Omi delivered a lot of new toys and more - she made a wonderful feast. We were all very thankful for her efforts and to be together. You rode Tom’s tractor and knocked down some trees. And you met a new friend named Sebastian, who was also six years old and visiting his grandmother a few doors up.
• At the Roller-skate family night fundraiser for Summit, you came in second place for your age group. The video your father took of you making your way around the track, falling but getting up and falling again, should be set to the soundtrack of Rocky.
• You are proud of the zit on your cheek. It was your very first zit and it was something only “big kids” have. It lasted maybe 3 days before becoming a light red mark of honor.
• We made the rule that you may not watch TV in the mornings until after you get all your morning things done: eat breakfast, get dressed, brush teeth and do your puffer. (Its only a few things, but you get easily distracted.) On 11/30, you got ready with plenty of time to turn on a show, but opted instead to be taken to school early for “second breakfast.” You love second breakfast.

And I love you, Patrick.

October 2016: 73 months (6 years and 1 month old)

Dear Patrick,
I didn’t take a lot of notes on you this month of October, which I’m calling the month of Mitch&Meg. Your parents focused on themselves and I’m not apologizing - I’m just stating this fact. Your dad had his first pool board meeting (as part of his quest to literally “rule the pool”) and I had a trip to Macon where I got to spend some much needed alone time with Omi and Pop, who as you know, are two of my most favorite people. There were a lot of date nights, and dinner with friends, and even a private Susto concert.  Also, although I know you thought I was a ninja (for you and like you) for Halloween, I have to confess that I dressed like Uma Thurman from Kill Bill because it’s one of your dad’s favorite movies. At the end of the month, your father and I treated ourselves to a vacation in Miami and it was one of the greatest trips we’ve ever had. I hope that doesn’t hurt your feelings - we did miss you, of course, but sitting by the pool and relaxing on the beach while "John" brought us breakfast shore-side did help. I should note that you hit a milestone: you can make two lattes without any help from us - you get cups, froth the milk, insert the Nepresso pods and can deliver that morning magic to us in bed (without spilling a drop)... but as I type, this particular note does sound more about your lucky parents. Well, we are the winners this month.

Oh, I do see on the calendar that you got a flu shot.

Love always,
Mom

September 2016: 72 months (6 years old)

Dear Patrick,

• I went to DC to visit Michael this month with Omi. You heard me telling your father about the side trip we took to Baltimore and you piped in, “Voldermort? You went to visit Voldermort?!”
• We wrote a poem on the way to school: “I like to run in the soft, tall grass / I like to run and I like to run fast / I like to run so I won’t be last." Yep, this is hard to get out of your head.
• As your dad was leaving with Uncle Sonny on their trip to Amsterdam, you got a little sad to see them leave. You hugged your Dad extra long.
• When your Dad was in Amsterdam, we got up early one morning and decided to do the school breakfast together just for fun. We went through the hot-line for eggs and grits and when we got to the cashier station, you put your arm out to block me and said, “I’ve got this mom” and punched in your food number. The other adults in the cafeteria offered us the big table, since I was there, but I declined in favor of sitting on the little chairs with your friends.  
• “What does ‘sid’ mean?” you asked. “Sid...ummm...well, what’s the context you heard that words? Use it in a sentence,” was all I could think to say. You were quiet and then you gave me your sentence very slowly and loudly: “What...does...sid...mean?”
• Bunky came to Greenville at the end of the month to leave his car across the street, and have a week with family before flying to Paris. 
• We celebrated your sixth birthday with Ninja style at the Little Gym and invited all your old Overbrook friends, the neighborhood crew and even a couple of new friends from Summit Elementary. You had a red-faced, needed water, felt like a king, great time and I'm so glad.
• We told you that you could not have a gumball before school and you were sad. I could see the water rim the bottom of your eyes. Your father and I walked ahead of you on the path to school but when we looked back, we saw you stomp your feet and find a weed to pull front the dirt and then throw it (extra hard!) back to the ground -- just because you knew we were watching. “I know you are upset,” I said, trying to help you put words to your feelings. “But we said no gum before school and there will be no gum.” I said this on a bended knee. I wanted you to know that we heard you so that you would feel understood. “Do you want to talk?” I pressed, hoping that communicating might help. You shook your head no and I let it go. We walked on. When our neighbor and friend Ashley Suber drove by and waved at you specifically, but you ignored her out of your anger for us, I bent down again and looked you in the eye. “It’s okay to feel mad, Patrick, but it is not okay for you to ever be rude.” We kept walking. When we got to school, the three of us parted. Your father and I were half-way back up the hill when we heard a yell: “Mooommm,” you shouted in front of the car line and the 5th grade safety patrol and all the other kids and parents... "Mooommm," you yelled again to get us to stop. There you were - this little figure - waving goodbye in your blue Air Jordan tennis jacket with both arms stretched above your head like an air traffic controller. I waved back - just as big - and blew you a kiss. And only because your father was there did I resist the urge to run back down the hill to pick you up in a bear hug and mutter "thank you" under my breath.

August 2016: 71 months (5 years and 11 months)

Dear Patrick,

• The Richards came to town and stayed across the street. We had so much fun: meals, puzzles, and a week long play date for all of us that I hoped would never end.
• The first day of real school was Tuesday 8/16 and I had no idea how “social” the world was at 7:30am in the morning. As we walked up the hill, friends passed with hands waving from car windows while other families in the neighborhood joined us on the sidewalks - dogs, skateboards and baby strollers in tow. It was like the Summit Drive Elementary Norman Rockwell parade.
• I remind you to have “an attitude of gratitude” more often than I care to admit this month.
• The second day of real school, we met the famous Mordecai Fink and his mother Anna. When she introduced herself, I had to resist the urge from saying, “Oh wow - can I take your picture to show my husband?” 
• Tennis started back this month, so you get a weekly date with Biggie.
• I love your sense of justice. Over dinner on 9/21 you explained how a boy named Hayden should have forgiven you after you said you were sorry, but instead this kid apparently “punched you in the neck.” Sometimes, in real school, a sorry just doesn’t cut it and there are throat punches instead.
• For the first Show-and-Tell of school on Friday 8/19, you brought Elephant. I asked what you’d say about him and you explained: “This is my Elephant. He has a broken tail and a small mouth so he has to take tiny bites. He is from New York - no, actually Africa.” And then with your hand cupped to the side of your mouth you said, “You know all elephants come from Africa.”
• “Mom, how ‘bout we hold hands so I don’t drift back,” you said on a walk to school. I like watching your vocabulary grow and “drift” is a memorable addition.  
• We asked you to take a bite of mashed potatoes during Sunday’s dinner on 9/21 and you leaned in towards your father and said, “Can I tell you something? When I eat food and it’s too squishy like this in my mouth, it makes me feel like I’m gonna throw up...and then it goes away.” Your face was so serious it was hard not to laugh when we told you to eat the mashed potatoes.
• The newsletter from school said you were working on “sight words,” which this week are colors: red, blue, yellow, orange and green. I wrote the words on note cards and your dad held them up for you  over dinner. Helping you study for your first “test” - seemed monumental to me; the first of many flash-card study aids to come.
• “Mom, they have a store at school,” you told me the morning of 9/22. I mimicked your excitement and told you to save your money. “Oh, I have lots of money - I’m gonna just bring in my dinosaur bank and BUY IT ALL.” (Make it rain, son.)
• You will occasionally ask if you can take my earrings out and you do it so carefully and kindly. 
• Casey and Molly Ingram came to visit the last weekend of the month and you two were fast friends. We ate lunch at Nosedive, ice cream at Spill the Beans, played “Sorry” in your PJs, had a spend-the-night party, made cinnamon rolls for breakfast and you two threw pennies into every fountain we passed downtown. I don’t know Molly’s wish, but I heard you whisper with eyes closed “lizard” each time. (You know that your life is good when your only wish is for a lizard!) And as luck would have it, your dad saw a reptile show advertised in the newspaper that following Sunday and we went. So you got to see your lizard after all. Wishes do come true.

July 2016: 70 months (5 years and 10 months)

Dear Patrick,

• The upside of a 16 year old beagle on July 4th is that he cannot hear fireworks.
• We thought we left Elephant at Southern Culture on 7/6 when we went there to celebrate Big Mitchell’s birthday. Elephant, however, was hiding in the back of your father’s car and, of course, we didn’t realize until after your dad had already driven back to the restaurant, talked to the waitress and sent out an APB on that rascal.
• On Friday 7/8 you wanted to wear a button down shirt and long pants to school. “Is there something special going on today,” we asked. “No, I just want to look handsome for my class.” You had me comb your hair over with water. When you got home from school that day, you asked if I’d put on a dress so we could go on a date. “We’ll go dancing and you can pick,” you told me. (Where did you learn this line?!) We ended up at Sidewall Pizza downtown and we let Dad be the third wheel.
• You fake burp so much that we had to tell you to please stop fake burping.
• Hair on your legs amazes you - “my legs look like Dad’s legs!”
• The Gergheteys came to visit this month and stayed across the street.
• You like to dance standing on my feet while we hold hands.
• You got a fat lip at school from sitting with your knees and arms inside your shirt in a chair and your face broke your fall since you did not have any appendages to help stop yourself.
• “Patrick, why don’t you change your shirt before we go out to dinner,” your dad asked. And you said, “Why don’t you change your pants!” and made yourself laugh so hard that even I thought it was funny.
• “Epic fail” I heard you tell Rivers over a play-date.